Home from Atlantis and headed for Aquilonia ... Jason Momoa

There are times when your jaw drops, and someone could knock you flat with a handy feather. This is one of them:

Jason Momoa as Conan the Barbarian --

No, I'm not kidding you! I'm serious! That's the Jason Momoa you know from Stargate Atlantis. You know, huge, dark and unspeakably gorgeous?



They've been trying to get this movie into gear for a couple of years now. The generic poster was painted for it, using the old genre of the torso with the head missing off the top, out of frame, and you notice it says CONAN 2009...

...well, it ain't 2009, kiddies. Anybody looked at the calendar lately? Mine says 2010. In fact, it says Almost At The End of 2011.

Last time I heard of the new Conan movie was waaay back in January, here:
http://www.slashfilm.com/jason-momoa-is-the-new-conan-the-barbarian/

At the time Jason Momoa was just one of three actors being considered for the part. God knows who the other two were. But the other day I was killing a few of those "hurry up and wait" minutes, and I landed on the Frank Frazetta official website. You might not know Frank Frazetta, but he was the artist who painted the covers for the classic Conan novels waaaay back in the 1960s...

I was on the website because I'd seen something recently that looked like a Tribute to Frank Frazetta, and I was thinking, "Damn, don't say Frank died." Yep, he did. In fact, he died back in May, 2010. Well, rats. He was one amazing artist. But while I was on the official site there was this photo ... and I knew that face.

"Get your first official look at Jason Momoa as Conan," it said.

Whoooo! Movie slated for 2011 release. Think I'm telling porkies? Would I do that? See here, for yourself: http://www.frankfrazetta.net/

That's the official Frank Frazetta page, Jason Momoa and all.

Oh yeah, this can be Conan...



Then, for the second time in five minutes, you could have knocked me down with the same feather again. I couldn't resist reading the comments on the article -- which is usually a mistake, because incredible idiots say unbelievably stupid things which just get the steam puffing out of your ears, right?

Sure enough, somebody did. Some certifiable loony says this: "He's not big enough to be Conan. Sigh. Will no one get the Conan thing right? They should really start by reading the original 12 books by Robert Howard. Arnold was great because he had a thick northern accent that Howard wrote of and was certainly huge. I hope like heck that the writers, directors and producers take the time (what like two weeks) to read he originals..." etc., etc. etc.

And before I could chime in with my ten pennies' worth, I saw there was a reply on this. Not only that -- are you ready for this? -- the reply was from Jade379, which if course is OUR Jade, the Jade, the artist, our artist! You know -- this Jade. Yeah. And she said the whole thing, perfectly...

Jason Momoa is a lot taller than Arnie ... a lot! I guess you're talking about the huge muscle mass when you say he's too small, right? I *have* read the REH cassic novels, and I think the size thing is all relative. Conan was described as huge ... Jason Momoa is actually enormous -- watch a few episodes of Stargate, and see. Also, he's an actor, and might easily affect a northern accent, with a good dialog coach. I've a feeling it's the comic art that makes us think of Conan as being a bit like a "shaved gorilla." In reality, it's endless hours in a gym, lifting weights, that makes a guy look like that. Conan's lifestyle, as depicted in the first movie -- all that running!! -- wouldn't build or maintain that body. He'd wind up looking a lot like you see right here in this pic. Food for thought!

Go to the page, see it, it's all there: http://theflickcast.com/2010/06/22/get-your-first-official-look-at-jason-momoa-as-conan/#more-40169

Is that cool, or what?!

David Tennant: Fright Night and Facelift. Whoooo!

Being rather a fan of David Tennant (who is my favorite of all the Doctors) I try to keep up with what he's doing whenever I have a spare hour ... which isn't all that often these days!

So, I search on "David Tennant" and ... well, I see this and I think to myself, "Good lord, they're remaking FACELIFT!!!"

And you're thinking to yourself, "What the bleep is Facelift, and why should I care?" Or else, "What the bleep is AG babbling on about now?!"

Well, it's like this:


And that's Martin Shaw as Zax in a 1984 Channel 4 SF musical called (!) FACELIFT. Zax was a magician ... a stage magician who had actual powers. It was a shoestring production, but it was amazing -- actually well worth remaking with modern technology. Get me going one day and I'll tell you about it!

But no, actually David Tennant is not actually starring as Zax in a remake of FACELIFT ... he's starring in a remake of FRIGHT NIGHT, in which Roddy McDowall played Peter Vincent, the vampire hunter:

And it turns out that Roddy McDowall is also one of my all-time favorite actors, so I'm happy as a clam here. Can't wait for the remake ... of FRIGHT NIGHT, that is. And you're so right, I'd love to see a remake of FACELIFT, and I wouldn't at all mind if David Tennant were to play Zax. Martin Shaw was very good in the part -- and what an oddball Zax was. Beautiful, but odd.

Hatsune Miku, Iron Man and Star Wars. Say -- what?!

Remember when you were told (if you're an SF fan, that is, and talking to somebody who likes to pooh-pooh SF and tell you everything is 1000 yeas in the future) that holograms were never going to happen because they have no foundation in real science?

Well, just now and again the SF fan gets the last laugh. And I'm chortling in large amounts of glee. And I haven't even opened the Father O'Leary's yet.

This here is something called Hatsune Miku. She (it?) is an anime pop star. It's a hologram that performs with a live band. Onstage. Live, in front of a live audience that's looking at the performance from every angle. So there's no way to fake it -- and why would you want to? Charlatanism is not what this is abut. It's just about a band on tour, and they animated their icon.

Now, anime isn't my thing -- and for somebody who grew up on Marineboy and Gigantor the Space Age Robot I say that with all due fervor and a couple of shudders. To me, the fascination of the Histune Miku hologram isn't any interest in the ainme popstar. But ... golly, that could be a hologram of ... anything. Anyone.

It could be the computer interfaces you saw in IRON MAN! What I see in this tale of Hatsune Miku is that the SF fans get the last laugh. Holographs work, and they work now, not in 1000 years.

And I think R2D2's horizontal hold might have been on the fritz:

...because out holographs look a lot better than the ones they were predicting in 1977!

LEIA: Help me, Obiwan Kenobi, you're my only hope!

OBIWAN: Damnit, the quality on this is crap. Can't you adjust it?

LUKE: I dunno. Let me have a go. (Kneels beside Artoo and starts fiddling)

R2D2: Beep! Squaaaaaw! Weeeedle ... wooosh ...awwwwwh.

LUKE: Does that look any better? I can't see it from here.

OBIWAN: Try adjusting the vertical hold.

LUKE: Okay, gimme a second here...

LEIA: I said, help me, Obiwan Kenobi, dadblast it, you're my only hope!"

LUKE: What's she talking about?

OBIWAN: She said something about some secret plans. I wasn't listening, I was trying to figure out why the playback's such crap. Any joy with the vertical hold?

R2D2: SQUAAAAAK! Weeble-beeble tooleoodleoodle ... (Subtitled into English: "Forget the goddamned playback quality and listen to the message, you brainless apes!")

See what I mean?! There's one in the eye for the guys who like to pooh-pooh SF

True Blood on the cover of the Rolling Stone

I'm probably not the only one that didn't find the recent teen-vampire romance movies either attractive or entertaining. Those vampires were just too vanilla. Too designer sculpted to be appealing to an audience of adolescents.

Okay, so here's the180-degree flip of the compass: the cover of Rolling Stone magazine, with three hot bods and a bucket of blood. That's Anna Paquin (from X-Men), her fiance Stephen Moyer (with the strategically placed hand), and co-star Alexander Skarsgard.

Right. Why didn't we think of this before? You get Brad Pitt, Antonio Banderas and Winona Ryder in a studio, lay down half a dozen garbage bags -- those big orange ones, big enough to pack half the garden after you've been busy with the weed whackers and chainsaws), and two buckets of blood, and you chuck the buckets over them.

Uh huh. Notice how none of the blood got on Anna's makeup, or in her hair? Now, if we could only figure out how to chuck two (or three) buckets of blood all over Brad, Antoni and Winona, and keep it out of their hair, and off their faces...

Want more on this? Indulge yourself right here.

I have one more question to ask. Who cleans the floor when the session's finished and the rest of the crew have gone home?

And speaking of Paul Gross --

And speaking of Paul Gross (which I was in my last post where I said my farewells to Canadian character actor Maury Chaykin), the man is back and looking terrific in a Canadian comedy-western called Gunless.

I stand no chance of seeing this movie, because as a low budget Canadian family comedy it won't play the theaters downunder, it won't be on TV here, it won't find its way into the Quickflix (local version of Netflix) catalog, and Amazon refuses to ship an American DVD to an Aussie address. Which is also why I don't have a copy of Buried on Sunday ... but have seen it on VHS a looooong time ago.

I could have a bit of a rant here about the unavailability of "lesser" movies in Aus. Or I could have a bit of a rant about the way American viewers are dissing the movie for not being a Hollywood style blockbuster ... as if a movie can be made on a teensy-weensy Canadian sized budget and come out looking like a Hollywood monster ... wake up, people!!

Or I could just run some pix of Paul Gross looking terrific, and hope to one day be able to see the movie! Um ... all things being equal, I choose the lesser of all those weevils. So, enjoy the pix, folks!

Goodbye, Maury

If your only interest in movies is for hot bods and sexy action, you're probably going to say, "Maury who?" But if you appreciate great performances from rock-solid character actors, you'll more than likely have known Maury Chaykin since Dances With Wolves, and that's a loooong time ago. Or maybe you saw him in several Canadian movies he made with Paul Gross (including, but not limited to the wonderful Buried on Sunday). Or perhaps you saw him as the XXXL outsized Goa'ould on Stargate SG-1, who departed the Earth with a wheelie-suitcase of cupcakes! Or you might recall him in Mystery Alaska, with Russell Crowe. He made a career out of being out-sized and trading on not being physically beautiful!

Yes, you have him now! Wonderful actor who could make you laugh or chill you (for example, in Cold Comfort, also with Paul gross). He's a character actor, and a Canadian, of extraordinary ability...

Maurie Chaykin died in a Toronto hospital last Tuesday. He'd been suffering from kidney problems. He was 61. Here's the full story, if you can somehow endure the stupid, intrusive, aggravating interface at CinemaBlend.com. And here is Maury's IMDB page ... what a list of credits!

Goodbye, Maury. We'll miss you.

Ewan McGregor talks about playing gay

With the indie I LOVE YOU PHILIP MORRIS languishing -- tough to find a distributor for such an out-n-out gay movie -- it's good to hear Ewan McGregor talk openly about playing gay characters. Which he does quite often, and enjoys doing...


This feature appeared online in OUT a few months ago ... and as you probably know, I've been working so hard, so long, I haven't had the chance to post much. So ... belatedly ... here's Ewan: Filthy and Gorgeous -- Ewan McGregor comes clean.

Makes interesting reading, well worth the click other there, trust me! Ewan McGregor has become quite the gay icon in the last decade and a half or so. Which is pretty good going for a straight guy --! Here's a very small quote which, for me, says it all:

“I’m always interested in playing different people, in different situations,” he says, sitting bolt upright, suddenly serious and eyeing the Pacific Ocean stretching below us. “It doesn’t matter to me whether someone is in love with a man or a woman. I find the idea of love and romance interesting. I’m a sucker for it. I like playing someone who’s falling in love because I like the sensation of it.” He pauses to give Syd [his dog] an affectionate pat. “People do extraordinary things when they’re falling in love.” http://out.com/detail.asp?id=26508