Pirates, pirates everywhere, and gallons of rum to drink!

The rumor circulating right now is that Disney is paying Johnny Depp about sixty million to return to the Caribbean, put on the hat and boots and, uh, do the whole Swishbuckler thing ... which is very nice of Disney, because Johnny had said months (years?) earlier that he wasn't done with the character of Jack and would be happy to play him a couple more times!


Same day ... more news: Keia Knightly came right out with it and said she won't do another one.


Same day ... no news: I was soooo expecting Orlando Bloom to be in the next one, and Disney didn't whisper his name in the press release where the movie was announced. Is that weird, or what? Okay, Elizabeth's story is done (she's going home pregnant: The End. It usually is, when you go home pregnant). But Will is out there as the skipper of The Flying Dutchman, and the way Jack flirts with death, you'd expect their paths to cross (and entangle) three times a week, and twice on Tuesday.

No wonder Orlie seems to have a headache. I guess we need to wait a while and see what develops. And while we're here, lets have a couple more photos, for the fun of it. Don't you hate it when people are stingy with the photos -- as if there's a national shortage of them! Enjoy ... I did!

Undies can be chic. Well, can't they? Ask Armani!

Undies. They lie there in the drawer, limp and kind of forlorn. Then you put them on, look in the mirror and think, "Gee, I should've bought a bigger size." And if you're really vulnerable you think, "Gee, I ought to eat right and exercise."


Unless your name is David Beckham, of course. Then you thing, "Gee, I wonder if Armani would pay me to wear their undies and strut my stuff in front of the camera, so that they can put the pictures on forty-foot-tall posters on the side of sky scrapers...?"


And the answer to this canny question is, "Gee, I guess Armani would! And did." Like so:


Woah. I'll just bet there were some traffic jams and fender benders on that block! The city traffic police were probably the ones responsible for the graffiti that wrecked the whole thing the next day, so they had to take it down ... just kidding, guys. I think.

A hobbit one gets into ... hey, that's James McAvoy!

First, an apology to everyone: I haven't posted in a couple of days. The reason is, THE HEAT. You might not be aware of this, but we were at 115F the other day, and it's only 95F overnight! I'm a grease spot, melted into the carpet, and somebody trod on me this morning. So, the reason I haven't posted is ... I reckon I'm lucky to be alive. AND this heatwave is going to continue on for another week --!! I'm starting to wish I were in Wellington --

And speaking of Wellington ... as in New Zealand ... as in Middle Earth ... let's get down to business! The last time I was able to post, I was talking about the new movie of The Hobbit, and then I had to take a rather nasty hiatus. So let me get back to where I was, and start there!

The movie is no only ON, it's been doubled. My info is that they're doing it in two movies. Th director has been set and alas it isn't Peter Jackson. However, it's somebody PJ knows and respects, and PK is going to produce, so ... good enough. The big question uppermost in everybody's mind is ... who's going to play Bilbo Baggins?

I'd have liked to see Iam Holm again. He says he's too old, but he probably isn't. The first time Gandalf meets him again in Fellowship, he (Gandalf) says, "You haven't aged a day," which means that Bilbo wasn't any spring chicken when he and the dwarfs went chasing Smaug. Gandalf reckons he looks the same. Anyway, there's my reasoning, but --

New Line (and they're probably right) seem to think the part ought to be played by a Young and Beautiful actor, probably to put bums on seats at the movie house! The last I looked at this half of the story, everybody was talking about James McAvoy.

You probably know him best from the movie he made half naked with his knees on backwards: Narnia. Yep, he was Tumnus the faun, who was seriously cute. But Tumnus is not the extent of James's potential (with or without his knees on the right way around). For your consideration, I present the photographic evidence:






...and based on that evidence, you'd kinda have to agree with New Line!

Parting shot: the Photoshop Fiends are at it again. The mock-poster I started with, and the Saruman I'm closing with, are not down to me -- I have no idea where they came from, but they're a good chuckle. If anyone knows source and credit, let me know -- I'd love to put them on...

Elijah Wood: Happy birthday, 2009

And today it's Happy Birthday Elijah Wood -- he turns 28! Time flies, doesn't it? The first time I saw Elijah Wood he was about 12, and he was playing Jamie Lee Curtis's son in the Mel Gibson movie, Forever Young.

History happened thereafter with the Lord of the Rings trilogy ... and the question fans are asking right now is, will he, Billy and Dominic be in the upcoming Hobbit movie? And this picture is NOT a costume call for The Hobbit, though one might wish it was:


The real problem with having Elijah, Billy and Dom in the next Tolkein movie would be simply that the three young hobbits didn't take part in the book ... in fact they wouldn't even have been born at the time Bilbo and Gahdalf took off on their previous adventures! ... so if they're going to be in the movie they'll have to be written into it. Or else they'll be under ten pounds of makeup playing dwarf characters. That won't be too good because when there's that much latex and paint on someone, you can't really SEE them! But for the story on this, click here: http://www.entertainmentandshowbiz.com/the-hobbit-the-hobbit-prequel-in-the-pipeline-2009012710073

Heath Ledger: happy endings

It's official ... Heath Ledger has earned more since his tragic and untimely death than he did when he was on this earth and making movies like A Knight's Tale and The Dark Knight. It's just too bad that the will he left is old, and leaves little or nothing to his daughter. (It all goes to his Dad, and down here the elder Ledger has something of a rep for not being able to handle money, so it seems.)

However, I heard something nice ... and let's be honest, Hollywood is not the usual place from which you expect to hear really nice things! Turns out that Johnny Depp, Colin Farrel and Jude Law came in to finish off the work Heath had begun on the Doctor Parnassus movie, and they donated their paychecks to Matilda Rose.

This is one heck of a nice story. Read more about it right here: http://www.dailystab.com/johnny-depp-colin-farrell-jude-law-donate-earnings-to-heath-ledgers-daughter/

...and meanwhile, let's have another couple of pictures while we're here. NOT the full-frontal totally nekkid one ... let's have a little respect for Heath, guys. Now's not the time ... and this blog probably ain't quite the place for that kind of in-ya-face explicitness. Thoughts, people??

Mikhail Baryshnikov: happy birthday, 2009!

It just doesn't seem possible to believe that Mischa is 61 years old today! And yet ... how long is it since I sat in a cinema watching White Nights, and wishing the boy would stop acting (which he does very well) and start dancing ... because noooobody in this world does that like Baryshnikov!

I feel privileged to be old enough to remember seeing him when he was young, when things like The Turning Point were brand-new.

I hear somebody out there saying, "Mikhail who?"

Let me get this straight: some of you don't know who Baryshnikov is? Take a word of advice from AG: find out. Find out soon. You have no time to waste.

And if you'll just keeping scrolling down, I shall avail myself of the opportunity to show you why!







There you go. Men in tights. And you thought the ballet was boring! Snarfle. Who told you that?!

Tattoo shriek, or do I mean chic?

Tattoos. I'm in a tattoo mood today since seeing this, while surfing for something else entirely:



I was searching for ebook software -- meaning, the kind of software that MAKES ebooks and lets you open them later, maybe even when you've done something daft and password protected the thing, and forgotten the password. So what pops up? Tattoos. Perfect, what else could you ask for? Well -- maybe this:



Viggo as art. Now, you have got to like that. Way to go, Mr. Mortensen. And while we're on the subject of the body as art --


Very, very nice indeed! So nice, in fact, let's have one more picture before we change the channel and get onto a new topic (don't worry ... it'll be dreadlocks next week):



Tattoos are very chic just now; makes you wonder what would happen if they stopped being chic next year, and it was considered gross to show them. There would be cause to rejoice if you'd just had 'em painted on, like this:



These are not really Maori tattoos, they just have that look. Maori cultural watchdogs are very hot on protecting their national icons, and will fight long and hard to keep their tattoos out of public usage.